My father Wim passed away in 1994. My bothers and I deeply loved him and still miss him. After our father died, my brother Frank asked us if he could have our father’s watch. This question was unusual because my brother does not care about “stuff.” We told him that he should take the watch; it obviously meant something important to him. A few years later, in 2000, I moved to the United States. As my brother came by to say goodbye before our departure, he handed me a small box. In the box was the watch. When I said “but this is the only thing you wanted from Wim”, my brother responded by saying “yes that is true, but when you give away something that is valuable to you, it becomes even more valuable.”
This was an amazing double gift. My brother not only gave me a memory of our father; he also taught me an important lesson. Giving away something that is valuable to us communicates to the recipient how much we care. As a giver, it helps us remember that it is not just about the gift itself, it is about the meaning of the gift rather than the object itself.
How do you make gifts? Is it easy for you to part from things that are valuable to you, or is it hard? Does making such a gift feel like a sense of loss, or does it give you a sense of release or even a sense of joy and enrichment? Do you own an item that is valuable that you can make more valuable by giving it away? Are you willing to try parting from that item in a meaningful way and discover what it means to you and to the recipient?
Many of us work under time pressure and time is valuable to us. That is why the gift of time can be precious too. How can you make somebody happy by giving them the gift of time? Giving somebody your undivided attention might be all it takes to make a positive difference for somebody else … and to yourself. Generosity does not just apply to objects, it can also apply to our time and our talents.