My 6-year old granddaughter Sanne and I are big fans of the stories of Frog and Toad by Arnold Lobel. Frog and Toad are—perhaps unsurprisingly—a frog and a toad. They are dear friends and have many adventures, which are all benign and friendly. Inspired by their stories, Sanne and I made our own Frog and Toad story “The Letter” that captures the spirit of the Frog and Toad books. Here is the story:
The letter
Frog wanted to write a letter to Toad. He wrote the letter, and he put the letter in an envelope. He wanted to send it off, but then he worried that the envelope would not be strong enough. So he put the envelope in another envelope. But then he decided that two envelopes might not be sturdy enough to protect his important letter. So he put the envelopes with the letter in a box. This looked better, but what if the box would fall and would not be strong enough to hold the envelopes? To be sure he wrapped the box in twine.
Now Frog was happy with the way his letter was protected, and he walked over to Toad’s house. He knocked on the door and gave Toad the box and said “Toad, I wrote you an important letter!” Toad took the box, he unwrapped the twine, he opened the box, then he opened the first envelope, and then he opened the second envelope. And then, finally he could read the message from Frog. This is what the letter said:
Dear Toad,
Hello!
Your friend, Frog
The letter made Toad very happy.
This story seems to be ridiculous because the message to Toad seems to lack the content to make it an “important letter.” And then Frog goes through a complicated effort to make sure this “important letter” makes it safely to toad, especially since he hand-delivers the letter anyhow. But the letter is important for two reasons.
First, the fact that Frog goes through much trouble to ensure the letter makes it safely to Toad makes the letter important. By going the extra mile, Frog communicates to Toad that his message is important. My brother and sister in law send us chocolate from the Netherlands every year in the winter holidays. The cost of the postage usually is more than the cost of the chocolate. And they take the trouble to go to the post office, fill out a custom form, and wait in line. In doing so they communicate that they think of us and want to connect. My brother and his wife are like Frog in the most positive way!
Second, the message of Frog may seem unimportant because it just says “Hello!” But the real importance of the letter is the line where Frog writes “Your friend, Frog”. In this closing Frog affirms his friendship with Toad. How can such an affirmation not be important? And as the last line in the story says, the letter made Toad very happy.
So, the lessons of the story are, (1) go the extra mile for somebody else and (2) express to them what your connection means to you. These are simple acts of kindness that help cement friendship. How can you support a friend by going the extra mile for them? Are you willing and able to do that? What can you do to express your affection and connection to somebody else with simple words like “I am your friend” or “I love you”? If you view the story in this way, Frog and Toad are sages instead of simple-minded characters.