On top of a mountain, I witnessed a beautiful sight of clouds cascading down a ridge. The movement of the clouds was smooth and natural, it was driven by an invisible wind. The picture captures flow at its best; it comes naturally, it is harmonious, and it expresses an invisible driving force. Psychologically we are in the Flow when we do something that we love, something that completely absorbs us. When in the Flow, we forget about time, and without conscious thinking our actions are guided by our accumulated experience and our intuition. When we are in the Flow, we feel good and we are at our best. In fact, as the psychologist Csikszentmihalyi argues, we need regular immersion in the Flow-experience for our wellbeing.
Playing the saxophone taught me a lesson about being in the Flow. With the level of my musical talents, playing my horn can be a challenge. In fact, there are days when I tend to judge the way I play while I am playing. A chord comes out the wrong way with a pronounced dissonant, I produce a squeak, or I simply can’t get the rhythm right. Because of my self-judgement my throat and mouth tense up and the quality of my tone deteriorates, and I spin into a downward spiral of “mistakes” and self-judgment. That is not the Flow experience that I was looking for at all! The root problem of this downward spiral is a lack of trust, in this case trusting that as an amateur I can play not-too-advanced melodies in a way that is pleasing to the ear. To be in the Flow we need to give ourselves over to the Flow. That can only happen when we suspend our doubts, and that we trust being in the Flow.
Since I became aware of the importance of trust, it has become easier for me to enjoy playing my horn. A key element was to mix practicing melodies or improvisations that challenge me with songs that come more easily to me. The harder melodies push me out of my comfort zone and help me get better, that is part of the learning process. The easier melodies give me confidence and Flow moments that I thoroughly enjoy. It is this mix of pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone while evaluating how we are doing, with moments of relaxation and unbridled play that allows us to get better while spending significant time in the Flow. Giving shape to this mix in a spirit of trust is recipe for success and wellbeing.
Here are some questions to reflect on. Are there areas in your life where you hold back, where you lack trust? How does this lack of trust cut you off from being in the Flow? How does this affect your wellbeing? What can you do to suspend the voice of the inner critic at appropriate times while using self-evaluation at other times when improvement is called for? And if this is a challenge for you, here is the most important question: are you willing to change so that you can harmonize trust with self-evaluation so that you can grow while spending significant time in the Flow? Perhaps you can be like a cloud moving over the mountain ridge … now that’s an image to emulate!